Someone please tell the crazy lady to stop putting clothes on me

Team primal smoke loves to cook outdoors, but with the crappy weather and the early sunset it has been quite a problem.  This meatloaf can be cooked on a grill if you choose, or you can just throw it in the oven.  This meal is also pretty low-carb if anyone else out there is dieting.  Now, I don’t need to diet, but we are headed to the Bahamas in about a week and a girl wants to look her best in a swimsuit, ergo said girl is dropping her carbs and adding in a day or two of IF to prepare.  Lets face it, I will probably be eating a ton of food and indulging in a few too many umbrella drinks, so when it is over i will be right back where I started anyways.  Still, gotta love a diet where you can eat a sh*t-ton of bacon and get ripped.

I am getting hungry just thinking about it!

Now… we took advantage of Tropical Traditions grass-fed beef sale and ordered a bunch, when it came in the mail I could barely contain my excitement.  Other girls get jewelry, my husband buys me meat instead.  I wandered around Trader Joes today wondering what to make for dinner  with my big new meat package and decided a bacon wrapped meatloaf would be a great way to kick of the beef-stravaganza.

For this masterpiece you will need

• 2lbs ground beef
• a package of bacon
• 2 cups sliced mushrooms
• fat of choice- I used duck fat and grass-fed butter
• ¼ cup chopped red onion
• one clove of garlic
• kale- I used 2 well packed and heaping cups
• a few sprigs fresh thyme
• crushed red pepper
• an egg
• and whatever you like to season your meatloaf with

I write this under the assumption that everyone knows how to make meatloaf, but if you want to know how to season your meat salt, pepper, marjoram, thyme, garlic, and onion seems to work well.  I used Organic No-Salt Seasoning from Costco with salt and pepper.

Ok, get yourself out a piece of tin-foil and start weaving your bacon.  This is easy, line them up vertically and take slices horizontally and weave them over and under.  It is like a big friggin bacon basket!

Next beat your egg in a bowl and add your meat and preferred seasoning.  Mix these all together until they are just well combined, but be sure not to over mix because this tends to toughen up ground meat.  Form it into a big beefy log on top of the bacon and use the tinfoil to help you roll it up.  I then wrap it all up in the tinfoil and throw it in the freezer to help the meat firm up, this will help your meatloaf keep its shape while cooking.  Heat up your grill to medium with a dual zone fire; alternatively you could turn on your oven to 375F and let that heat up while your meat is in the freezer.  Why the hell not, dinner has to be easy sometimes right?

You don’t have to use all the bacon, just until your basket looks done! Leftovers are fair game.

Cook your meatloaf to your desired done-ness right on the tin foil.  I left mine in for about 40 minutes, but I really like mine with quite a bit of pink in the middle.  If you want it more well done you can cook it for about an hour.  If you cook it for the full hour, pull it out halfway through and snugly wrap the ends with the foil so that they don’t burn.   Don’t forget about the 10-15 minutes of resting time at the end either.

Ok, while that is finishing up sauté your kale with the thyme, fat of choice, salt and pepper, and a sprinkle of crushed red pepper to taste.  I like to add a few tablespoons of water or broth to the pan when I cook kale too.  Next sauté your mushrooms and onion in your fat, and remember not to salt them until the very end.  It helps them cook quicker.

I poured my mushrooms and onions over top of everything else, but I really dig mushrooms.  People that hate mushrooms seem to really despise them, if that is you just make the meatloaf…but I love me some mushrooms.  Also this whole meal has about 12 grams net carbs, which is totally kick ass, plus it is super-duper filling.

My plate looks like crap with the mushrooms on it…whatever it is not supposed to be pretty is supposed to taste good

If you aren’t counting  carbies, I have a meatloaf secret to share with you.  If you want it to be so tender and moist that it will knock your socks off, add about half of a pureed onion to the mixture.  The liquid in the onion helps keep moisture inside and you end up with a loaf full of awesomeness.

I will probably give you another post or two of my kick-ass food before I go on hiatus, so you can see more of my “diet food.”    As always, the secret ingredient is love!

Grok on!

(from DC Museum of Natural History)