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Grilled Tri-Tip

Sorry I havent written in a very long time…did you miss me? Of course you did! I have been suffering from a condition known as “baby brain,” where my pregnant body has decided to shuttle all of my body’s resources into the new little parasite leaving me semi-retarded. What brain function I do have left is reserved for focusing on all the sh*t I need to do/research/buy over the next few months…and housework, I really need to do some housework, when I have the energy, turning food into a human being is exhausting enough.

Now, the tri-tip is a seriously under-rated piece of meat. It is part of the sirloin, and is (hands down) the best roast on a cow. It is very well marbled, which means its tenderness rivals our beloved filet(at 1/4 the cost).

After trimming any rouge hunks of fat, we rubbed ours with a good strong beef rub that had a lot of coarse ground malabar black pepper, salt, and garlic with just a little bit of chili powder, paprika, and onion powder. Then start up a dual zone fire on your grill, one side for searing and the other for cooking.

We cooked the tri-tip for 5-7 minutes each side over high heat, then moved it over to indirect heat and threw in some cherry wood. Let the tri-tip cook for another 20 minutes or so, or until the internal temp gets close to 140 on the thick end.

Top your meaty goodness with a few chunks of Kerrygold butter and wrap in tinfoil. Let the meat rest for at least 20 minutes, I throw mine in the microwave or oven so it doesn’t cool to quickly.

Slice, serve, and then come thank me for introducing you to this amazing cut of meat!

7 Comments

Posted by Primal Smoke on February 13, 2013 in Beef

Tags: crossfit, food, healthy, low carb, meat, Paleo, Primal

Pizza Chili

05 Feb

Yep, I am cooking indoors again for a while. Cold and snow aren’t my thing, I am not dedicated enough to my livelihood to go outside and freeze my ass off when I am a freaking awesome at inside cooking too. I know it is a lame excuse.

Pizza in a bowl beats liquid pizza nightmare, hands down

So, this recipe was created from a craving for pizza and a love for chili…all of the home-made pizza taste, with only a fraction of the effort

Ingredients:

1 TB fat for browning your meat
1 pound of ground pork
1 pound of ground beef
1 TB dried basil
1TB dried oregano
1 t ground thyme
1 can of tomato paste
2 cans or 1 tetra-pak of diced tomatoes
2 TB chili powder
1 package of white mushrooms
1 bell pepper
1 onion
4-5 cloves of garlic
2 t paprika
2 t parsley
2 t whole fennel
2 TB balsamic vinegar
a few bunches of fresh basil
whatever pizza toppings you like, pepperoni, olives, go crazy!

Ok, I know that sounds like a lot, but most of this stuff you probably already have if you keep a well-stocked paleo kitchen. Start by heating up a pot, or dutch oven to brown your meat in. After it looks cooked through add your balsamic vinegar and deglaze, that means scrape all of the tasty bits off the bottom. Add in the tomatoes and tomato paste, then all your veggies, and spices, reserving half of fresh basil for adding at the end, and the other half garnish. If you are feeling naughty throw some cheese on the b*tch…whats pizza without cheese?

There is a little trick to getting beautiful basil confetti, stack the leaves up and roll them like a cigar, .then cut across to get perfect little strips, and voila! Perfect basil garnish

2 Comments

Posted by Primal Smoke on February 5, 2013 in Beef, Pork, Soups

Tags: crossfit, food, health, low carb, Paleo, Primal

Leftovers: Italian Pulled Pork Two Ways

29 Jan

Ok, so you just made a whole pork shoulder over the weekend, now what the hell are you supposed to do with all the leftovers? If you are like me, you will get sick of eating that much BBQ, there is only so much of the same food I can eat before saying f*ck it, and end up giving the leftovers to the dogs.

Please please please can we have some? Look we are sitting pretty!

Anyone who knows how big an entire pork shoulder is knows how necessary these leftover recipes are. You will need:

1/4 cup balsamic vinegar
3 TB dried basil and oregano
1 tea of onion powder
6 cloves of garlic
2/3 cup sun-dried tomatoes chopped(I get mine dried like raisins, but packed in oil will work too)
1/2 an onion
a sprinkle of parsley
crushed red pepper (to taste)
2 cans of diced tomatoes(I buy the tetra-paks that are 26 ounces, but the cans are usually 14 ounces)

Heat the sauce in a dutch oven and stir until everything is combined. Add in your leftover pulled pork and heat thoroughly. Sprinkle with parsley and serve!

Wait….there’s more! No BBQ? No problem(I am talking to you Megan). You can take a pork shoulder roast or picnic roast, and cook it indoors too. I have had it both ways and it is equally delicious!

Like so

Preheat the oven to 250F and start warming up your dutch oven on the stove with a bit of cooking oil. If you don’t have a dutch oven use a heavy for browning skillet and then transfer the pork to a roaster or oven safe pan with a lid or covered in tin foil(maybe even a crock pot if you want to throw it on before work and come home to a perfect dinner). Add in the balsamic vinegar and deglaze the tasty bits off the bottom of the pan, then add in your sauce ingredients. Stir until combined, then cover and put that awesomeness in the oven for 4-5 hours. After a few hours, check the pork, it should start to pull apart easily. Pull the chunks you can apart, give it a quick stir, and back in the oven for another hour or two.

I did not really time this, I just left it in the oven all afternoon. Once it breaks apart into pulled pork easily it is done! I usually check periodically, then turn the oven down to 175 or off and leave it in there until my hubby gets home to enjoy that deliciousness. Chances are you will not burn this if it stays in for a few extra hours.

Also the SousVide and TX Bar Organics recipe showdown voting is up, please take a minute to vote for Primal Smoke and get yourself entered to win a great gift card! What BBQer wouldnt want 200$ of free beef?

4 Comments

Posted by Primal Smoke on January 29, 2013 in Pork

Tags: barbecue, Barbeque, bbq, crossfit, food, health, low carb, Paleo, Primal, weight lifting

SousVide Surf and Turf Benedict

28 Jan

In case you haven’t heard, the SousVide and TX Bar Organics paleo blogger challenge is in full effect. Please take a minute and vote(for me of course). Anyone who votes is automatically entered to win one of the $200 gift cards. Here is the badass breakfast recipe I created for the challenge…

Ingredients:

1.5lbs of cooked snow crab legs or approx one cup of crab meat
3 eggs
1 teaspoon of Old Bay seasoning
3 cloves of garlic minced
1 finely chopped jalapeno
1/4 teaspoon of onion powder
12 tablespoons of minced red onion
1-2 tablespoons of coconut flour
1/2 teaspoon of duck fat + extra for frying
2 TX Bar Organics grass-fed filet mingons
salt and pepper

Ok, I am going to commit a meat sin here for the sake of competition, I am going to take the worlds most perfect cut of beef and slice it open and mutilate it prior to cooking…please don’t be afraid, I am a professional.

Start by gutting your crab legs and mixing the meat with one egg, garlic, jalapeno, onion, and the spices. Add in one TB of coconut flour and check the consistency, you may want to add a bit more (slowly), so that it holds together.

Next, take that beautiful TX Bar steak and cut it lengthwise almost all the way through, to form a pocket for all your tasty crab stuffing. Salt and pepper both the insides and outsides of the steaks, if you don’t salt your food you don’t love the people you are cooking for! Top each steak with 1/4 teaspoon of duck fat and seal them into a SousVide pouch. Before you go to bed, throw the steaks into a SousVide water oven, at 54 degrees Celsius(just over 129F).

In the morning, your delicious breakfast will be ready and waiting. Heat up a cast iron skillet and sear the steaks on each side in a bit of fat to get a nice brown crust. Now, I know that benedict style breakfasts are usually served with a poached egg, but I haven’t poached a d*mn thing since I went paleo…why bother when fried eggs are so much better(and easier). Place one egg, fried in duck fat, on top of each steak and smother with coconut hollandaise.

Creamy Coconut Hollandaise ingredients:

1/3 cup coconut cream
3 egg yolks
1 tablespoon coconut oil
a squeeze of fresh lemon juice
2 tablespoons chopped chives
1/4-1/2 teaspoon Old Bay
salt and pepper to taste

Put the egg, lemon juice, and coconut cream into a bain marie(glass bowl over a pot of boiling water), and whisk like your life depends on it. Seriously, just keep whisking until you think your arm is going to fall off. Slowly steam in melted coconut oil and continue to whisk until the mixture is emulsified. Mix in your chives and spices to taste, this sauce will thicken up as the eggs cook. Garnish your meal with some chopped chives and fresh grated horseradish(optional) This is the only breakfast delicious enough to stand on it’s own without the addition of bacon, that is no small feat, but feel free to serve with bacon if you’re feeling frisky(your tastebuds will thank you).

6 Comments

Posted by Primal Smoke on January 28, 2013 in Beef, Breakfast, Seafood

Tags: barbecue, Barbeque, bbq, contest, crossfit, food, healthy, low carb, Paleo, power lifting, Primal, steak, weight lifting, weight loss

Frog Leg and Filet Faileo

22 Jan

I love it when a recipe comes together…this however is not one of those times. I grabbed some frog legs at the store and figured I could do what I always do, experiment in the kitchen and be lucky enough to have it turn out perfect. What I should have done is look for a recipe ahead of time before I decided to throw those b*tches on the BBQ

Here is what I started with,

4 pairs of frog legs
Juice from one lemon
1/2 cup olive oil
1 t coriander and onion powder
2 cloves of garlic
2 TB white vinegar
3 beef tenderloin steaks
salt and pepper

I mixed all of the ingredients except the meat together in a bag and threw in the frog legs, they marinated in there for about 3ish hours. I then cooked the delicate meat on the grill for 60-90 seconds per side. These are prone to getting tough and drying out so don’t leave them on too long.

Whoever said these things taste like chicken is on drugs…they are not like any chicken I have ever tasted, and I have put some questionable food-like substances in my mouth in the past! If I were to cook frog legs on the grill again, I will marinate for at least 48 hours and glaze them with a vibrant sauce. They just don’t have any flavor on their own and they really need some things that are not whole30 approved to make them edible(like sugar)! I know why most people batter and deep-fry these little guys.

Now, here is a little tip for cooking beef tenderloin steaks. When You pull them out of the package they just do not look pretty and perfectly round like what you get in a restaurant, so tie around the edges with some butcher twine and it will help mold your steak, like beautiful beefy play-doh. The only thing you need to season these with is salt and coarse ground pepper, anything more would be a crime. Cook them on the grill for 5-7 minutes a side, and don’t forget to let them rest before serving.

So there you have it, the worlds best steak and the worlds worst amphibian. Seriously, those frog legs were friggin gross! I would eat them in a survivalist situation if left with no other options, but I am pretty sure I would eat my cat before trying to catch those slippery little f*ckers….sorry Lyra

Noooooooo

7 Comments

Posted by Primal Smoke on January 22, 2013 in Beef, Random, Seafood

Tags: barbecue, Barbeque, bbq, crossfit, fail, food, healthy, low carb, Paleo, Primal

Asian Stir-Fry with Seared Ahi

15 Jan

I hope a tanker of human waste explodes in front the home of the CEO of Monsanto. They have actually started an ad campaign just to let the public know that they care about us. They aren’t selling anything like most commercials you see on TV, they are just reassuring public how much they have done for farming and how much they care about our health and the health of the planet. Commercials like this one that make me so angry at the television I end up looking crazier than Charlie Sheen and Gary Busey put together, babbling away and ranting at an inanimate object.

I seriously can’t handle the stress of having all of this knowledge, ignorance truly is bliss. Someone get me some chocolate before I have a stroke.

On to the Asian grill invasion:

Sashimi Grade Ahi Tuna- we used 6 filets
5 cups broccoli florets
1 onion
1 bell pepper
2 bunches of radishes
5 cloves of garlic
powdered ginger and garlic
sesame oil
Wasabi flavored SeaSnax, finely chopped(optional)

Let your ahi come to room temperature for at least an hour before cooking. You do not want perfectly seared ahi on the outside that is frozen in the middle. Brush your ahi with sesame oil to keep it from sticking to the grates and sprinkle on both sides with garlic, ginger, salt and pepper and set aside. If you are awesome, you will bust out your Weber Wok to make the stir fry. Isn’t that thing f*cking wicked?! It is part of the cast iron Gourmet BBQ System. If you don’t have one of these you can cry in the corner for a while and then get out any grill-friendly pan you have.

Have you ever had radishes in a stir fry? It is seriously incredible! Chop all of your veggies and throw them in the wok with a couple tablespoons of water; just a precautionary measure to keep things from drying out. Ok, now that we are all prepped let’s start-up our coals. While your fire gets hotter than an illicit celebrity sex tape, you can go prep your sauce.

Whisk together:

1 TB white vinegar
4 TB sesame oil
4 TB coconut aminos
2 TB of powdered garlic
2 TB powdered ginger
1 TB Korean Red Pepper -this is a mild sun-dried red pepper flake, if you are going to sub for regular crushed red pepper reduce the amount.

Cook your tuna for 90 seconds on each side for rare, and absolutely no longer than two minutes. These babies cook quick so you have to babysit them. When all your tuna is cooked, carefully swap out the sear grate for the wok, or just put your grill friendly pan on. Brush your cooked ahi with a bit of the sauce and set aside while the veggies cook for about 10 minutes on a covered grill.

Pour your sauce over the veggies and put the cover it back up for another 5-10 minutes, or until everything looks cooked through. Serve the stir-fry with sliced ahi and a sprinkle of wasabi SeaSnax on the top.

All of my pictures are terrible, I had one hell of a time trying to get a good picture of this dish for reasons I am not going to get into, because then I will start ranting again…so you are stuck with this…but trust me, it friggin wowtastic.

“We are living in a world today where lemonade is made from artificial flavors and furniture polish is made from real lemons.”
-Alfred E. Newman

This post is also featured over at The Polivka Family, Real Food Forager, and Growing Home go check it out.

6 Comments

Posted by Primal Smoke on January 15, 2013 in Seafood

Tags: barbecue, Barbeque, bbq, crossfit, food, low carb, Paleo, Primal, seafood

Death By Carbs

11 Jan

The moral of the story? Eat more meat!

10 Comments

Posted by Primal Smoke on January 11, 2013 in Random

Tags: diet, food, low carb, Paleo, Primal

Chipotle-Cajun Jambalaya

07 Jan

How is everyone doing on their New Year Resolutions so far? I honestly can’t wait until the flood of people give up on their “work out every day” resolution and I have some space at the gym again, jeesh. I wanted to give up coconut butter for new years, but I knew that would last about an hour so I made a few more reasonable goals.

Deadlift double bodyweight
Squat 200lbs
give up coffee
do a whole30/sugar detox hybrid
read more books

I know what you are thinking, I must be f*cking insane giving up coffee,convenience foods, and all fruit and sweet potatoes at the same time, but I don’t like to do anything half-assed. I am already into my 2nd book this month, real ones too, not the kind with lots of pretty pictures, and I obviously have to slowly work up to my strength based goals, although I am getting really close. Working out in January sucks though, I wish all these people decided to buy a treadmill instead of a gym membership…at least then they could use it as a coat rack when they quit.

Ingredients:

4 cloves of garlic
1(or 2…I will explain later) cans of tomatoes
12oz of bone broth, or whatever broth or stock you have on hand
2 bell peppers
1 onion
3 dried chipotles
A package of chicken breast tenders, or two chicken breasts sliced up
2 cups of shrimp
Pork sausage
I also snuck in a handful of kale or two

Ok, so the cajun mirepoix(base veggies for soups) is always bell peppers, celery, and onion; however it was like the apocalypse or something when I went to get celery from Trader Joes because the produce section was bare. An employee informed me that they did not get a produce truck that day so I was sh*t out of luck. There goes my cauliflower rice and celery….if you have these things, then by all means please add them to the recipe, but I was not hauling my ass all over Virginia looking for organic celery.

Lightly grill your chicken tenders, they cook fast so someone should be baby sitting them, that is actually why I used them, because they don’t require a lot of cooking. They don’t need to be perfectly done, they will finish up in your stew so just a few minutes on each side. Set aside the shrimp and sausage, then chop everything else up and throw it in your dutch oven, I cut up my chipotles with kitchen shears because it will save you a sh*t ton of time. D insisted that there was not enough liquid in the pan and that it would not cook right, not wanting to argue about the veggies releasing liquid as they cook I let him throw a second can in, this just made it more like a stew…if you like things on the soupier side add two cans…or don’t…I don’t really care.

We used hickory wood in the 22.5 inch Webbie and cooked this for about 30 minutes uncovered while the sausage got nice and smokey off to the side. We then added in about 4TB of cajun-style seasoning:

2 1/2 tablespoons paprika
2 tablespoons Dizzy Pig Swamp Venom (or for Whole30/Sugar Detox sub with salt and add cayenne pepper to taste)
2 tablespoons garlic powder
1 tablespoon black pepper
1 tablespoon onion powder
1 tablespoon dried oregano
1 tablespoon dried thyme

Your sausage will be done when the internal temp reaches about 160, slice it up and try not to eat it all while the rest of your food finishes cooking. After 30 minutes on a grill toss your shrimp into the jambalaya and put the cover on the dutch oven. Let everything cook for another 20-30 minutes or until everything looks cooked through. Adjust the seasoning to your taste, we added in a couple extra tablespoons, and serve.

The hubbs informed me that avocado is not very cajun…you should eat it anyways though because it is delicious.

3 Comments

Posted by Primal Smoke on January 7, 2013 in Chicken, Pork, Seafood, Soups

Tags: barbecue, Barbeque, bbq, crossfit, food, healthy, low carb, Paleo, Primal

Myron Mixon’s Cupcake Chicken

04 Jan

Now, we love the show BBQ pitmasters, but you cannot watch this show without being subjected to the loud mouthed jackass pitmaster known as Myron Mixon. I personally find him a bit too abrasive, but the hubbs loves him. Anyway, the show got me thinking, all the people on there have really badass BBQ names, and Derek and Michelle just doesn’t sound quite as cool as Hickory Rick and Shotgun Chelle. Ok, that was the best I could come up with…maybe they’re not the best pitmaster names, but maybe theyre at least as cool as Paul Diablo, Johnny Trigger, and Tuffy Stone. I am still working on the names…I need some help. What do you think?

I know its gross that they cat is on the table, you try telling a cat what to do.

I know its gross that the cat is on the table, you try telling a cat what to do.

So, Myron Mixon does this competition chicken in a cupcake pan, so that the end result is perfectly round and uniform, making for a nice presentation. So, we got Myron’s top-secret method…which you cannot get from watching the show, you have to shell out 30 bucks for his book of course. Anyway, we adapted it for Primal Smoke, since we are not too keen on following any recipes that call for 5lbs of sugar and 1 cup of MSG “flavor enhancer.” Seriously, you cannot help but laugh when you read that!

You will need:

A cupcake pan with holes drilled in the bottom, as a bonus, now you cant scarf paleo cupcakes because you don’t have a pan to cook them in.
a cookie sheet (we used disposable)
enough chicken thighs to put one in each hole…in this case 12
bbq rub
bbq sauce
chicken stock

Ok, so the holes help the meat drain, so that it does not get “water-logged,” A collection of liquids in the muffin pan will ruin your perfect, slightly crisp skin that is so sought after when cooking BBQ chicken. You can start prepping your meat by cutting the knuckle end off of the bone and trimming the bone down until it fits in your pan. Trim all the big chunks fat off the edges of the chicken, and especially off the edges of the skin. I know fat is good for us, but too much fat =soggy, rubbery skin. Sprinkle a little BBQ rub, or just some salt and pepper on both sides of the chicken thigh and place it skin side down in the pan.

Be sure to trim off any excessively large chunks of meat that stick out of each little nest and then throw those babies on your smoker. We used our stick-burner for this one, which is a large offset box that we burn whole logs of wood in, instead of the usual charcoal-wood chips combo that I use for the bullet. Put the cupcake pan onto a cookie sheet and pour a layer of chicken stock into the cookie sheet, being very careful not to get it on the meat.

Don’t use your good bone-broth for this, as you are just going to discard it later

Smoke the meat at 275 using a strong wood, we used mesquite which is traditionally not for chicken, but the meat is only in the smoker about as long as the media cared about John Travolta flashing his junk to a hotel masseuse…not very long, so it makes a stronger wood acceptable. Smoke the chicken for about an hour, or until the internal temp gets to about 140-145, then pull it off, flip the chicken and put it back in the pan skin side up. Before returning it to the smoker sprinkle the skin with more rub, or salt and pepper, then put it back on the cookie sheet and let it cook for another 30 minutes or so. Once the internal temp hits 155-160, brush some sauce on top of the chicken and close the lid for another 20-30 minutes.

When they come off the smoker, cover them with some foil and let them rest for about 3 minutes, then glaze again with sauce one more time before serving. Here is a perfect recipe for BBQ sauce, this stuff with make your meat sweet and juicy, like JLo’s backside.

That’s it for this week, we have been Qing up a storm of Whole30/Sugar Detox compatible foods, so check back next week for more smokey goodness. Shotgun Chelle signing out!

7 Comments

Posted by Primal Smoke on January 4, 2013 in Barbeque, Chicken

Tags: barbecue, Barbeque, bbq, crossfit, food, healthy, low carb, Paleo, Primal

2012 up in smoke….

31 Dec

I am totally on the New Years bandwagon here, just giving you lots of old posts because I am too lazy to write out a new one. I am going to share the best of the best of 2012 just in case you missed it…I have only been up and running since September so you havent missed much though.

oh yeah baby!

The greatest thing I did this year was BBQ brownies. It is still my number one day of traffic ever….which proves to me that you people suck, seriously, pureeing some sweet potatoes and cooking them in chocolate is not anywhere near as impressive as the perfect brisket. Still, they rock…we will definitely make them again once all the january sugar detoxing/whole30 hybrid is over. Anyway, there will be a few recipes that overlap here, because I know that nobody is going to sit here and read every link I posted…if you want to, by all means go ahead, and please leave your full name in the comments section so I can spell it properly on the restraining order.

Important lessons:
Planking (and bacon)
Using Skewers
Tempering and Resting your meat
Starting a good fire
Choosing your charcoal
Getting the right big-boy-toys
Basics on using a smoker, and the perfect hunk of meat for a newbie

There is more to be learned about smoking, in 2013 there will be a series called “Better know a smoker” and important information on rubs, BBQ competitions, and other random rants and tirades about why I am right and you are wrong. Now on to the meat…